"It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship
that makes unhappy marriages."
- Friedrich Nietzsche
In my work with couples, I use an integration of evidence-based therapy models, such as: Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy skills (DBT), and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), as well as Mindfulness and Mind-Body techniques to help clients regulate physiology during periods of intense emotion or conflict.
The primary tools and techniques that I use to treat couples are from Gottman Method™ Couples Therapy, based on Dr. John Gottman's research that began in the 1970s and continues to this day. The research has focused on what makes relationships succeed or fail. From this research, Drs. John and Julie Gottman have created a method of therapy that emphasizes a "nuts-and-bolts" approach to improving clients' relationships. In other words, you will learn specific skills to manage and resolve conflict, and to thrive and be happier together.
The majority of the therapy will involve sessions where you will be seen together as a couple. However, there may be times when individual sessions are recommended. I may also give you exercises to practice between sessions. Although much learning and insight will happen in our sessions together, the bulk of the process to repair and improve your relationship must happen between sessions, as you and your partner work to change your patterns and interactions, and practice new and more successful ways of being in relationship.
The length of couples therapy will be determined by your specific needs and goals. In the course of therapy we will evaluate your satisfaction and progress, and I will encourage you to raise any questions or concerns that you have about therapy at any time. If you have a complex case, such as a relationship in extreme crisis, you may require a more in-depth process, including written assessments. In the Couples Therapy Disclosure Addendum form (on the Helpful Forms page) you will find more detailed information about what to expect if you work with me as a couple.